First Don’t Be A Fault Finder…
If your prospective date has never been married, it’s clearly due to anger management issues or a cat-hoarding obsession, right? But if you let those kinds of assumptions guide all of your dating decisions, then you just might be missing out on finding The Right One. Your first step on the road to an awesome relationship should be questioning these common myths about the never-been-married dater… regardless of whether you’re a man or a woman.
“He’s probably a jerk.” Well, it’s true that he might be — but there are plenty of men out there who have been married who have the exact same character flaws. When it comes to dating, this particular trait is more likely to reveal itself in learned behavior . If so, marital status notwithstanding, he might be a jerk… or he might just be clueless on how to make the right impression on women. In the case of men it is usually more likely he is clueless on how to make a good impression on women and not necessarily a jerk.
Often stereotyping becomes a tool for women to determine whether a man is a safe bet before they get emotionally involved with him.
“He’s a commitment-phobe who’ll never marry.” Sometimes the exact opposite might be true. Perhaps he was laser-focused on settling down before now, but his ex-girlfriend decided that she wasn’t quite ready to take the plunge when he proposed. We’ve all bet on the wrong partner before at some point in our lives, and there’s no reason to punish the guy simply because his previous relationships didn’t work out.
“She’s too picky.” We all have the right to select the partner that’s right for us, and it’s possible that The One simply hasn’t crossed her path quite yet. Resisting the temptation to marry to the wrong person just for the sake of getting married should be applauded, not vilified — wouldn’t you like to be given the same courtesy?
If a man wants to go from stereotyping to making a real connection, he must go about his search with an open mind.” That “difficulty” that you think you’ve identified in someone’s personality may just be what makes her the perfect mate… for you.